Happiness

[vdansk]

I am inherently optomistic...second generation, at that.  My glasses are always 51% full, my tomorrows always bright.  When I fall into despair, it is a journey rather than a destination.  I just don't fit there very well.  In the midst of tragedy, I interrupt my own misery with humor or whimsy.

Today, I am in a fog of Prednisone...a lovely drug that makes many people irritable or morose.  It makes me giddy.  Rarest side effect ever.  (And my dreams get super-vivid in gorgeous color.)  Now, the fact that Prednisone changes breathing from "painful and difficult" to "effortless and unthinking" may have a lot to do with the giddiness...all that oxygen!  This is, truly, the only drug that I would ever be tempted to abuse...and it is so very toxic that I will keep it for breathing.

This disjointed beginning is to explain that I am ecstaticly happy that my Pern club has woken up, and it's hard to tell where Prednisone leaves off and satisfaction kicks in.  Things have been very slow for the past month, and I have been trying hard to keep things going...and today I had 40 messages in my inbox, and only 3 were spam, there were 10 new messages on the boards, and Anna is back!  (Anna is one of the 3 co-leaders, and is busy preparing to move.)  I have 9 stories received for the first issue already, with about a dozen more promised, and a whole month to deadline...and i am indecently optomistic.  The fact that I am writing again is certainly part of that.

Soon before I discovered LJ in the midst of deciding to revive StarRise, my creative outlets had become...well, let me give an example.  I came up with the plot to an entire science fiction novel based on my younger daughter's Little People play sets.

This clearly called for desperate measures.  And in writing again, and editing again, I am feeling so much more...me.  Like a person, independent of profession, or even of motherhood.

So, it's natural that watching StarRise grow and thrive would cheer me immensely. 

And the prednisone doesn't hurt.   ;>

Comments

[aerden.livejournal.com]

Hope--Breathing's good!

I haven't noticed that prednisone (or prednisolone) affect me much, but I do remember dreaming with my eyes open after having a rhinoplasty when I was 18. I don't know what I was given, but that would be my abuse drug of choice. I saw very vivid images of Romans standing in a marble room with columns, and red velvet curtains hanging all around with gold fringe on them.

I should show you some of my Paul Graves (Harry Potter) stuff, sometime. He was the character who took over my mind after Aerden. I don't think I wrote him very well, in retrospect, but it was still a wonderful ride.

*happy sigh*